Are we done packing yet?
The great thing about marriage is that it’s all about ‘we’ and not all about me. We’ve all heard the expression “There’s no ‘I’ in team”. Some reply and say, “Yeah, but there’s an ‘m’ and an ‘e’ to spell me!” Well, there is an ‘I’ in marriage but maybe there shouldn’t be. Marrage. Sounds bad. If we take out the ‘me’ to make a ‘we’ we get… Warrage! That’s worse! DOES NOT WORK! That sounds too much like what I’m trying to advocate against! :-)
When it’s about we, there should be support, love, understanding. Not belittling, arguing and dishonouring. People are often so quick to try to place blame. I’m confused when someone looks in and sees dishwasher full of clean plates and asks “Who forgot to empty the dishwasher?” Obviously, ‘we’ ALL did! Why don’t we just pitch in and get the job done?
The ‘we’ thing works great. Like on a weekday night, Sara will look in the cupboard and notice there are no juice boxes for lunches. “Steph, there are no juice boxes left. We really should get some”. I gamely take my keys and head out the door. I come back 15 minutes later. “Look hon, ‘we’ went and got some juice boxes!”
One of the best pieces of marital wisdom I ever heard was about a decade ago from my then single 20 year old cousin. He said, “The problem with a lot of marriages is that too many couples forget that they are on the same team”. My cousin is since happily married and the proud papa of a beautiful little boy through adoption.
So, are ‘we’ done packing? Nearly! Now don’t get specific and ask how much packing each of us has done! I did bring some things into Li Lin’s room hoping they would find their way into a suitcase. There are several full suitcases in the main hallway, waiting to be carried out to the car in a few days. I’m not exactly sure how they all got there, but somehow, ‘we’ are nearly completely packed. Let’s hope that ‘we’ did not forget to pack our toothbrushes!
Anyways, I’d better go. ‘We’ need to do the dishes!