Wednesday, 23 May 2012

On her own terms! ~ Steph

I am going to apologize in advance to any ‘cat people’ that I may offend.  I myself am neither a ‘cat person’ nor a ‘dog person’.  I’m solidly a ‘hamster person’, especially since the older two children are trained to alternately clean out the cage every week.  The hamster needs food and water once a week and exercises herself any time she wants by running nonstop on a wheel that leads nowhere.  I wonder if that is where we got the idea of a treadmill… but I digress.

Stereotypically, dogs are always happy to see their ‘people’.  The tail is wagging and the mouth is open in a wide goofy grin with a bit of slobber dripping out the side.  They are always up for a hug or attention of any sort.  A cat on the other hand, is selective.  Cats like you on their own terms.  If they want alone time, you can hardly find them, and if you do, there is no way you will get close enough to pet them.  On the other hand, when a cat wants attention, they will rub up and purr against anyone’s leg or unceremoniously plop themselves into the lap of whoever it may be, with that “I want that little scratch behind the ears NOW” look.

Li Lin is a lot more like a cat than a dog (or a hamster!).  She definitely likes me now, but ON HER TERMS!  She is hilarious.  She will often insist that I am around when she is eating.  She is very good at sharing with me and making sure I am fed.  But the bathroom is an absolute no-no!  She will even at times call out to me when she needs to go to the bathroom so that I come and then she can make a show of pushing me away and ask for mama!  Usually when playing downstairs, she will make sure that I am around.  She will occasionally come of her own volition and crawl into my lap, or pat the seat beside her, asking me to sit down.  But, if I try to pick her up and she doesn’t want it, I find out in a hurry!  I am also entitled to go on a walk with her as long as I am accompanied by her mama or at least one of her siblings!

We are currently co-sleeping with Li Lin (apparently one of the best ways to for attachments with a newly adopted child).  Li Lin likes to make sure that someone is in bed with her and within arm’s  reach when she sleeps.  That person of course is Sara.  Throughout the night, she will slightly come to, reach out with her little hands and make sure that Sara is nearby.  She will then wiggle just a bit closer to Sara.  Eventually, Sara is lying on the very edge of the bed.  A couple nights ago, we both came to in the middle of the night and we switched sides of the bed so Sara would have a bit more space.  A little while later I felt a little hand on my arm.  It felt the less smooth skin (ok, furry).  Her hand moved up to my face and felt the scruff.  Then, still in sleep, she batted at me (her ‘go away from me’ action) and she wiggled across the bed towards Sara.  Even in sleep… she likes me ON HER TERMS!

Here she is doing the 'thumbs up' in front of her new little kitchen.


  1. Well Steph, looks like you have a challenge and are up to it. Like all girls you need to woo her in order to win her heart. Find what her love language is and you have the key to her heart forever.

    Tante Ca xox

  2. Good advice above. You make the situation sound humorous, but I'm sure it's not aways in reality! We're getting to know her through your words and the pics you post... and well.... I'm in love with her mischievous little grin! :)
    You'll win her over... don't despair! :)

  3. Love the last two pics that you cute!! Tell Hudson that Auntie Pam thinks he makes a super big brother to Li Lin, judging by the hug she's giving him in the last pic. I think little Li Lin is just brimming with personality! She makes me laugh :) I think it's awesome that she's so great at sharing, too. So can't wait for you guys to come this summer so we can meet her in person. Still praying for you all. Love, Pam

  4. Steph, you are also very funny. I am sure that you are not used to being pushed away. Everyone loves you. This might help you understand some less fortunate people. At least you know that Li Lin loves you. I loved your comparison of Li Lin to a cat. That is absolutely the way she is. Maybe shortly she will turn into a faithful dog. Ha! Ha! Love you all and all your efforts into making the transition for Li Lin as painless as possible. Mom xoxoxoxoxoxoxox